LONELY AND DEJECTED

Dear Ella and Suse,

I’m a 31 year old psychologist, and I’m incredibly lonely and suffer from depression as a result of my loneliness.

I’ve always thrown myself into work and study as a way to cope with my loneliness, however my study has finished and work has recently gone pear shaped for me.

My personal relationships are in the toilet - the older man who I am still very much in love with, has always kept me at arms length and left me for another woman a second time (the same woman).

My only friend has always kept me at arms length and avoids me when he knows I'm down in the dumps. I also found out I owe the tax department a significant sum so cant really afford a break to gain some perspective and seek out some human company.

I’m going to spend the Christmas/new year period on my own, and I was hoping as a substitute for human company you could recommend a few good books to help me keep me company?

If you would kindly consider that my IQ is in rejection mode at the moment, and I may not be able to tolerate anything too cognitively demanding, I would be very grateful : )

Lonely & Dejected
Dear Lonely and Dejected,
We are so sorry to hear about your predicament! And we hate the idea of you being lonely over Christmas, but agree that you can and will find solace and comfort in books. Depending on how low your literary level is happy to go, we have a list here of comfort reads.
The Friday Night Knitting Club – this is warm and cozy, as well as being empowering and optimistic
The Enchanted April by Elizabeth von Arnim – to remind you that there is still hope for love- and to take you to beautiful Italy
Dorothy  Sayers – the Nine Tailors  Because the female detective is such great company
May we be Forgiven by A M Holmes – this has characters in it who are as depressed as you , and they go through some terrible things, but the feel of the book is ultimately uplifting , with dark dark humour
Even Cowgirls Get the Blues by Tom Robbins – Robbins can be totally relied upon to give you back your love of life, and your self-respect as a woman
Finn Family Moomintroll – Tove Janson – yes, this is a children’s book! But Tove Janson was an amazingly wise woman, who knew about life in all it’s loneliness and magic, and she put this into her books for children and adults. Janson lived on an island for mch of her life, with her long term female partner, and coped with extremely simple living, which set her imagination free. We recommend that you buy yourself the whole series of these books for Christmas, and read them one by one – they are beautiful, quirky and fascinating psychologically!
With all good wishes,
Yours,
Ella and Suse
We prescribe - The Friday Night Knitting Club by 
The Enchanted April by Elizabeth von Arnim
The Nine Tailors by Dorothy Sayers
May we be Forgiven by A M Holmes
Even Cowgirls get the Blues by Tom Robbins
Finn Family Moomintroll by Tove Janson
  • Hey, I might try those books, too, since I - most likely - will be alone for the holidays. Christmas always makes it harder to deal with loneliness. :(

    By Bo Farewell on 14 Nov 2015

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A SLUG WITH VISIONS OF HUMANITYABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP ENDED, LEAVING SCARSADULT ACNEAFRAID OF FAILUREALCOHOLIC DAUGHTERALONE ON A WIDE, WIDE SEAAlways wanted to be a writerANOREXICANXIOUS ABOUT SINGLE FRIENDAT A FORK IN THE ROADAVID READER, LACKING BOOKBEREFT OF A CATBORED IN ALABAMABOTHERED AND BEWILDEREDBRAIN SHRINKING MOMMABROKENBROKEN HEARTBROKEN HEARTED - TORN BETWEEN MALE AND FEMALE BEST FRIENDSBROKEN UP WITH GIRLFRIEND; FEELING BURNT OUTCAN’T MOVE ONCANDIDA REVOLTAIRECan’t afford to go on holidayCAST ASIDECHEATEDCHRONIC PAINCOLD HANDS AND FEETCONCERNED ABOUT DAUGHTERCONFLICTED PARTNERSCRAVING FOOD CULTURECYNICAL STEPSONDAILY ABUSEDARK NIGHT OF THE SOULDEPRESSED AND UNABLE TO READDEPRESSED DURING CHRISTMAS, AND LONELY NOWDESPERATELY WANTON GIRLDIRECTIONLESSEASILY BORED WITH NOVELSEMOTIONALLY SABOTAGED BY MY MOTHEREMOTIONS IN EXTREMEEVER THE FRIEND AND NOT THE PARTNEREXTREME ANGER AND FRUSTRATIONFADING AWAYFALLEN OUT WITH MY FRIENDSFALLING IN LOVE WAY TOO FASTFAZED AND CONFLICTEDFEAR OF CONFRONTATIONFEAR OF GETTING OLDFERTILITY PROBLEMSFOMO (FEAR OF MISSING OUT)FORGING A BRIGHT NEW FUTUREFRIEND WHO HAS LOST A CHILD LATE IN PREGNANCYFRIENDS DAUGHTER LOST TO SUICIDEFrightened of lifeGAPING HOLEGetting over a break-upGIRL OF UNCERTAINTY, BOUND BY RULESGIRL WHO DOESN’T FIT INGRIPPED BY LOSSGUILTY FRIENDHOPELESSNESSHOUSE AND LIBRARY DESTROYED BY FIREI love music more than booksI no longer commute – and therefore I no longer readI PEEK AT THE END OF NOVELS BECAUSE I WORRY THE CHARACTER MIGHT NOT MAKE ITI wish I were famousIN MOURNING OVER LITERARY DEATHSINABILITY TO SIT STILL AND ANXIETYINCONSISTENT AND NON-STUDIOUS- BUT AMBITIOUS NONETHELESSINDECISIVEINSECUREINTERESTED IN EVERYTHING BUT ACHIEVING NOTHINGINVISIBLE WOMANITALIAN NOVEL CURESJILTED AND UNSUREJOB IN LIBRARY UNDER THREATKICKED IN THE HEADLEADENLIVING ON THE MARGINSLONE RANGERLONELY AND DEJECTEDLONELY IN LOVELONELY IN MONOTONOUS JOB, LOSING SANITYLOOKING FOR A SENSE OF PURPOSELOOKING FORWARDSLOSS OF A SISTERLOSTLOW WATTAGELOW-ENERGY PESSIMISMMAD SCIENTISTMARRIED TO A MAN, ATTRACTED TO WOMENMISSED THE BOATMISSING MY MOTHER-IN-LAWMUM GOING BACK TO WORKNEED TO LET GONEW CITY, NEW LIFE -BOOKS FOR 12 YEAR OLD BOY?NEW FRIENDSHIP WITH HOLOCAUST SURVIVORNIGHTMARISH COLLEAGUENOMADIC FLANEURPOST NATAL DEPRESSIONPREGNANT AND ALONE